What was it like when you started your infertility medical investigations and journey? I feel like I’ve just graduated to the big girls club and that this shit just got real (as if it wasn’t real enough before).
Apparently I was very…erm.. tight and I did incredibly well at dealing with the pain. The Dr said ‘This is your womb’ and I replied ‘Hello womb.’ As I stared at the empty space, I felt really sad inside but refused to show it. She then said ‘Oh look, your egg is on its way down. Half way.’ And there it was, a big black space that was in fact an egg. I felt so proud and in awe. Women get excited at seeing their babies and yet I was so so sooo proud of that one egg. The Dr told me that it was a good sign – that I was managing the PCOS.
I have to say the Dr was amazing. We (Mr Husband & I) both felt a strange connection with her and she said we should get in touch with her if want her to help more. Maybe it’s because she was from the same home country as me – it just seemed like she read beyond my smiley easy going mask and saw real pain. She saw the young Muslim girl who hasn’t been able to give her husband a child.
She was so caring, reassuring and straight forward. Her advice was blunt: It’s time for assisted help and this may be a case of unexplained fertility. We all believe that I am ovulating, even the folks at Duo Fertility think so.
My fallopian tubes are fine – she did pause when looking at the second one because she couldn’t see the dye. At that point I was about to have a panic attack but then I was blessed with a ‘Oh here it is.’ All looks normal.
I felt strangely emotional afterwards when I sat there sipping on my tea. I was so grateful that my husband was there, that the results were good but most of all that I had two amazing medical professionals helping me through it all. For the first time in a long time, I felt as if God was with me.
I could see a rainbow in the rain.