Last night I spent most of my time awake and clutching my stomach. I’m getting pains whenever I need to pee. The cramps are cruel. Throbbing like AF. I cried just before I left for work because I feel unable to cope with all of this right now. It’s like the end is creeping up on me.
The cramps made me turn back half way to work, there was no way that on the commute home I’d be able to stand and hold a bag. I’m now sitting at home feeling depressed and I can’t face my work.
In the middle of the night I tested on a Clear Blue digital, my hcg should at the very least be 2000 by now which should trigger 3+. It showed 2-3.
I can’t cope, so I called the doctor and asked him to move my scan to tomorrow morning instead of Thursday. I really want to be positive but I don’t have a good feeling about this.
Even if a pregnancy isn’t viable, it’s so hard to say goodbye when you’ve spent over 6 years working for it.